My Calm and Creativity
My purpose is this. My purpose is creating. Creating for me. Not for my boss or for school. It’s an outlet for me to release and escape all that is built up inside. I tell myself; once a week, one coming of age movie. It’s a self prescribed necessary activity for my joy and my creativity.
Recently, while watching the campfire as I lied against my boyfriend I thought about my brain. I pictured it as a room. And in the very back corners were calm and creativity. Calm, in the back left corner is a big blue blob, hanging out, waiting for me whenever I make the time. In the back right corner is creativity. Orange and crisp, wanting to be expressed when I give it the space within my day.
You see, these things in life we do just for ourselves... they are sitting and they are waiting. They are always there, in the back of our minds. Wanting to be felt and experienced. Wanting to help.
All calm and creativity want is to bring out the real me.
The only way to do so is to remove myself from everything at the forefront of my brain; school, work, assignments, emails, to do list’s, “should’s” and “haven’t done yet’s”. Obligations, schedules, plans and texts. They can all wait. Always. I try to please everyone in the world but myself sometimes and I still fall up short.
Remove it all once in a while. Do more things that make you forget about the world for a couple hours.
A feel good, make me cry, coming of age kind of movie (Today's: Dear Evan Hansen)
Singing and dancing to my favourite musicals because as much as I try to suppress that music theatre in me, she’s been there for years and wants to come out more often than I admit to myself
Baths and books - light candles, pour in some bubbles… it always feels better than I think it will when I take that extra step
Record a podcast, tell a story and be so authentically me (as I try to release all judgements and barriers I may be holding on myself like "what will people think?")
Have a god damn belly laugh. This one is harder to plan but it’s easier to do than you'd think. Call the people you love and trust with your whole being. The ones you can be your silliest self around and I’d say for sure by an hour in you must’ve had an at least a chuckle. I love my belly laugh people more than they know.
Trust yourself. Know when you need to turn it off and check out. Life's to do list's will always exist. It's apart of being alive. Let it go, check out and be with yourself. You'll never regret it, and if you do, do it more. Because there's a lot more for you to learn about yourself.